It was like a billion stars warp speeding their way through me and I arrived somewhere, a nowhere except for a place of a beat.
Stretching out fully with my inner sight, the beat sounded familiar and I brought my full attention to its rhythm; I realised we were one and I was in the heart of Mother Earth.
She/I were the centre of the whole universe, the heart of all matter seen and unseen. There was no fear, just love and an evolving gnosis to experience herself through me an all her children.
The vision panned out and I felt myself growing with her, up higher until I could see her as an infinite tree and her canopy was glowing with optic-like fireflies of whom all were souls in this quantum reality of life.
There was only peace and a settling on my soul fell about me, remembering my breath to breathe I with her in this oneness.
Returning to her heart, she let me know there was no separation, we became one until it filled my awareness so ultimately that I let go of my body completely.
The birds began an exquisite song, it was like the breaking dawn on the most beautiful summer day. I felt as though I were laying in grass with gentle warm winds kissing my aura.
I heard my name being called, I knew it was the Grandmothers calling me home. There was no rush to greet them, all was well and everything in place. I didn't want to move as the birds codes filled me with grace.
I arrived back in my bed to an early morning chorus with the knowing of home is all about us
Grandmother Ayahuasca took my hand last week and we peeled off the layers of my skin and unfolded it like a map of the universe.
She showed me how when we incarnate, our body moulds itself to the conditioning of not only our environment and culture but also it moulds itself to the promise of the work that we would do on this plane.
I enquired more and saw how when we have pain in our bones and when we have trauma etched in our skin, it is not ours to keep and as we work on our bodies, we are in fact in great service to the oneness of humanity.
The extraordinariness of our temples gave me fresh eyes. Within us we have the power to mould our bodies under the eyes of love, for we are love.
Our bodies are our first and last connection to this Earth. Our bodies are loyal AF! Continuing to show up day after day, even if all you can do is crawl, even if you can not move, the consciousness of our bodies continually wants to serve us.
I'm 40 next year and this is the first time in my life I am genuinely curious, from a place that's for me, at what fitness could look like, at what bountiful health could become. I want to love and accept all of me from the top of my head to the tips of my toes.
My beloved has always reflected this message back to me but I was too stubborn to see, still wounded that after all traumas and hardships that I needed to rest. Now I see and it's very humbling because moving my body in a way that my body actually needs is a new concept and I admit I'm sore at being a beginner!
I don't always accept the stories of my body but I do love my body and it is my intention to fall more and more in love with it for the rest of my life. I love my body's womanliness, my narrow waist and big breasts. I love that I created life with this body. I love to make love in this body, I love its sensuality, I love my body's strength to carry on even when my mind has given up.
I love that my body is healthy enough to bleed every cycle and remind me that I AM WOMAN.